One thing we have all questioned at one point or another in life is our identity and where it’s placed.
When I was 16, I started a bucket list. Of course, it’s full of dream destinations and activities like any other bucket list.
But one thing I wrote down was,
“Feel confident in myself.”
I officially checked that little square off when I was 20 yrs old.
You may be asking, “Why write that on a bucket list?”
Because I was so far from loving myself as a person, from seeing myself as beautiful that it seemed like a dream to see myself any different. I had lost my identity and where it should truly be placed.
It felt so impossible. Not only because I didn’t want to but I also didn’t know how to.
Since the age of 6, I lived with mistrust and confusion.
From the age of 10, I lived with anger, doubt, fear, hurt, and anger.
They became more like my imaginary friends rather than visitors for a moment.
It has taken me years, tears, loss, hard-work, prayer, and sacrifices to find my true identity in God.
Through all of the things though God taught me so much.
There’s never a formula for getting to a certain place within yourself. It’s a God thing. So, I can’t really give you a one size fits all thing. I can only share what I know to help guide you in the right direction.
YOUR IDENTITY: WHERE IT’S PLACED (7 WAYS TO FIND IT)
Submerge Yourself In Prayer + The Bible
This seems like an obvious one but I feel I must still mention it. Prayer allows us to lay our flesh down in repentance and strengthen our spirits. Reading the Word Of God teaches us about God and reveals his heart through parables, demonstrations, and guidance. Becoming familiar with him first will help you become more confident and comfortable in yourself as his vessel.
Get To Know Yourself
It may sound cheesy but give it a chance! We tend to think of relationships with other people. The truth is, you are in a relationship with yourself too. And that’s pretty important! How we view and treat ourselves bleeds over into how we view and treat those around us. So spend some time with yourself and get creative! And as your get to know yourself pay attention to the things you love about yourself, your strengths. Then, really hone on them.
Stop Hiding
Once you’ve fallen in love with yourself as a person, and your strengths, you then have to also accept your weaknesses too. I know it can be daunting but no one is perfect. In order to grow, you have to face the areas that need them most. And most importantly, God doesn’t want perfection. It’s in our weakness that his light shines through the most. So let God fill every place of the void.
Be Patient
Now here’s the hard part, being patient with yourself. Now, remember how I said God doesn’t want perfection? Well, he doesn’t expect it either! Through your process of growth, you have to give yourself so much grace and patience. Because I will warn you now, you will not grow at the rate you expect yourself to. So let the expectation go! Give it to God and trust the journey.
Change Your Perspective
If you managed to extend patience to yourself then you’re ready for the next challenge.
A lot of times when we view ourselves a certain way for so long it also alters the way we see the world around us. It can be easy to play the victim. But in order for us to truly walk in our identity, we have to also view the world and those in it the way God does.
Letting Go
This one, I still struggle with because I am a strong perfectionist which also causes me to want to control what I can. But here’s the thing. To truly walk in your true identity as a child of God, you have to let go of that control. Because you willingly embrace that your life is no longer yours. Now, obviously, as I said, I still struggle with this myself. So of course you won’t always get it right. But like a muscle, when exercised more and more, the stronger it becomes.
Walk In Boldness
As humans, we will never do all these things to a T but hopefully, through all these things, you see yourself in a new light. Not self light or society light. But in Gods. Now you have to dance in it. See your beauty and let God use you.
I truly wanted to share all this with you because I know what it’s like.
I know what’s it like to look in the mirror and question your beauty, even, life.
Or what it’s like to question your value based on relationships and society.
And I know what it’s like to be so weighted by fear and doubt that it prevents God from using you in ways he desires to.
The good news is that I now know too, what it’s like to know my true identity. And that’s what I want you to experience too!
The Bible says “ where the spirit of the lord is there is liberty.”
I believe that implies to us too. The more God dwells inside of our hearts and minds, the more liberty we feel in our spirit!
Letting go of control allowed God to teach me how to treat myself. To stop hiding my flaws for fear of not being loved. He taught me that I’ve always been loved and will be. Because my flaws don’t make me ugly, they just make me human.
Having more of him in my life has helped remove my distorted lenses and put on clearer ones.
Ones that see a beautiful woman of God when I look into the mirror. And ones that don’t see the world as such a scary place. But a world full of people in need of something just like I was.
I promise, that putting your true identity in God opens so many doors emotionally that you achieve on your own. I want you to experience this feeling of freedom too!
Don’t forget your identity and where it’s placed.
Remember to BU, it makes you, you.
Love,
Samantha Nicole
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